Funny but oh so true Diary Bit rude !!!
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Funny but oh so true Diary Bit rude !!!
by Boothjendar Sun Aug 28, 2011 8:59 pm
DIARY of a year of someone who DIDN'T buy a Cave House
July- Just left the UK for our new house in Costa del Sol,Southern Spain . Now this is a place that knows how to live! Beautiful, sunny days and warm, balmy evenings. I watched the sunset from a deckchair by our pool yesterday. It was beautiful. I've finally found paradise. I love it here!
July- Really heating up now. It got to 31 today. No problem though. Living in air-conditioned home, driving air-conditioned car. What a pleasure to see the sun every day like this. I'm turning into a sun-worshipper – no blasted drizzly rain like back in the UK!!
July- Had the back yard landscaped with tropical plants today. Lots of palms and rocks. No more mowing lawns for me! Another scorcher today, but I love it here. It’s Paradise!
July - The temperature hasn't been below 35 all week. How do these people get used to this kind of heat? At least today it's windy though. Keeps the flies off a bit. Acclimatizing is taking longer than we expected!
August - Fell asleep by the pool yesterday. Got second degree burns over 60% of my body. What a dumb thing to do.. Got to respect the old sun in a climate like this!
August 7th- Didn't notice Kitty (our cat) sneaking into the car before I went out this morning. By the time I got back to the car, Kitty had died and swollen up to the size of a shopping bag and stuck to the upholstery. The car now smells like Whiskettes and cat-**** . I've learned my lesson though: no more pets in this heat!
August 15th - This wind is a b#####d. It feels like a giant f****** blow-dryer, and it's hot as hell! The home air conditioner is on the blink and the repair man charged 200 euros just to drive over and tell me he needs to order parts from f****** Madrid .....The wife and kids are complaining all the time
August 20th - The temperature's up around 40 C and the parts still haven't arrived for the f****** air conditioner. House is like an oven so
we’ve all been sleeping outside by the pool for the last 3 nights. Bloody 600,000 euros house and we can't even go inside...... Why the hell did I ever come here?
AUGUST 22nd Finally got the f****** air-conditioner fixed. It cost 1,500 EUROS and gets the temperature down to around 25 degrees, but the humidity makes it feel about 35!....Stupid repairman!.... F****** thief!!
AUGUST 29TH If one more smart b#####d says 'Hot enough for you today?' I'm going to f****** throttle him!..... F****** heat! By the time I go
anywhere, the car radiator is boiling, my f****** clothes are soaking f****** wet and I smell like baked cat!..... this f****** place is the end of the Earth!!
AUGUST 30TH Tried to run some errands, wore shorts, and sat on the black leather upholstery in my car..... I thought my f****** arse was
on fire. I lost 2 layers of flesh, all the hair on the backs of my legs and off my f****** arse. Now the car smells like burnt hair, fried arse and baked cat!.... F***, F***, F***!!!
September 1ST The Weather Report might as well be a f****** recording! Hot and sunny!... Hot and sunny!.... Hot and f****** sunny!... It never f****** changes! It's been too hot to do anything for 2 f****** months and the weather-man says it might really warm up next week!.... f***!!!!
SEPTEMBER 2ND Doesn't it ever rain in this damn f****** place? Water restrictions will be next, so my 5,000 EUROS worth of palms might just dry up and
blow into the f****** pool. The only things that thrive in this f****** hell-hole are the f****** flies!... You don't dare open your mouth for fear of swallowing half a dozen of the little black b######s!!!
SEPTEMBER 3RD Welcome to HELL! It got to 45 f****** degrees today. Now the air-conditioners packed up in the car. The repair man came to fix it
and asked, 'Hot enough for you today?'.... I wanted to shove the f****** air-conditioner up his f****** arse!... Anyway, I had to spend the 2,500 EUROS mortgage payment to bail myself out of jail for assaulting the stupid p###k!!.....f****** Costa's! What kind of sick, demented f****** idiot would want to live here???
SEPTEMBER 4TH - WHAT!!!! The Weatherman says "Heatwave on the way!" You are f****** kidding me???......................
Adapted from another Forum
July- Just left the UK for our new house in Costa del Sol,Southern Spain . Now this is a place that knows how to live! Beautiful, sunny days and warm, balmy evenings. I watched the sunset from a deckchair by our pool yesterday. It was beautiful. I've finally found paradise. I love it here!
July- Really heating up now. It got to 31 today. No problem though. Living in air-conditioned home, driving air-conditioned car. What a pleasure to see the sun every day like this. I'm turning into a sun-worshipper – no blasted drizzly rain like back in the UK!!
July- Had the back yard landscaped with tropical plants today. Lots of palms and rocks. No more mowing lawns for me! Another scorcher today, but I love it here. It’s Paradise!
July - The temperature hasn't been below 35 all week. How do these people get used to this kind of heat? At least today it's windy though. Keeps the flies off a bit. Acclimatizing is taking longer than we expected!
August - Fell asleep by the pool yesterday. Got second degree burns over 60% of my body. What a dumb thing to do.. Got to respect the old sun in a climate like this!
August 7th- Didn't notice Kitty (our cat) sneaking into the car before I went out this morning. By the time I got back to the car, Kitty had died and swollen up to the size of a shopping bag and stuck to the upholstery. The car now smells like Whiskettes and cat-**** . I've learned my lesson though: no more pets in this heat!
August 15th - This wind is a b#####d. It feels like a giant f****** blow-dryer, and it's hot as hell! The home air conditioner is on the blink and the repair man charged 200 euros just to drive over and tell me he needs to order parts from f****** Madrid .....The wife and kids are complaining all the time
August 20th - The temperature's up around 40 C and the parts still haven't arrived for the f****** air conditioner. House is like an oven so
we’ve all been sleeping outside by the pool for the last 3 nights. Bloody 600,000 euros house and we can't even go inside...... Why the hell did I ever come here?
AUGUST 22nd Finally got the f****** air-conditioner fixed. It cost 1,500 EUROS and gets the temperature down to around 25 degrees, but the humidity makes it feel about 35!....Stupid repairman!.... F****** thief!!
AUGUST 29TH If one more smart b#####d says 'Hot enough for you today?' I'm going to f****** throttle him!..... F****** heat! By the time I go
anywhere, the car radiator is boiling, my f****** clothes are soaking f****** wet and I smell like baked cat!..... this f****** place is the end of the Earth!!
AUGUST 30TH Tried to run some errands, wore shorts, and sat on the black leather upholstery in my car..... I thought my f****** arse was
on fire. I lost 2 layers of flesh, all the hair on the backs of my legs and off my f****** arse. Now the car smells like burnt hair, fried arse and baked cat!.... F***, F***, F***!!!
September 1ST The Weather Report might as well be a f****** recording! Hot and sunny!... Hot and sunny!.... Hot and f****** sunny!... It never f****** changes! It's been too hot to do anything for 2 f****** months and the weather-man says it might really warm up next week!.... f***!!!!
SEPTEMBER 2ND Doesn't it ever rain in this damn f****** place? Water restrictions will be next, so my 5,000 EUROS worth of palms might just dry up and
blow into the f****** pool. The only things that thrive in this f****** hell-hole are the f****** flies!... You don't dare open your mouth for fear of swallowing half a dozen of the little black b######s!!!
SEPTEMBER 3RD Welcome to HELL! It got to 45 f****** degrees today. Now the air-conditioners packed up in the car. The repair man came to fix it
and asked, 'Hot enough for you today?'.... I wanted to shove the f****** air-conditioner up his f****** arse!... Anyway, I had to spend the 2,500 EUROS mortgage payment to bail myself out of jail for assaulting the stupid p###k!!.....f****** Costa's! What kind of sick, demented f****** idiot would want to live here???
SEPTEMBER 4TH - WHAT!!!! The Weatherman says "Heatwave on the way!" You are f****** kidding me???......................
Adapted from another Forum
Last edited by Boothjendar on Sun Aug 28, 2011 9:07 pm; edited 2 times in total (Reason for editing : giving credit and editing rude words)
Boothjendar- Posts : 526
Join date : 2010-03-21
Age : 56
Location : Los Carriones
Re: Funny but oh so true Diary Bit rude !!!
by bigcol Mon Aug 29, 2011 8:51 am
Brilliant entertainment, and so true
At least in inland Spain you get a different climate,
Boothy ! You remember the day we arrived in convoy to you new home in castilljar?
Thought you moved to the wrong country lol
Col x
Thanks for making me and Sharon smile
At least in inland Spain you get a different climate,
Boothy ! You remember the day we arrived in convoy to you new home in castilljar?
Thought you moved to the wrong country lol
Col x
Thanks for making me and Sharon smile
bigcol- Posts : 933
Join date : 2010-03-19
Age : 64
Location : On the high seas somwhere!! I've stopped drinking water .... I hseen what it does to the bottom of our boat!
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